Monthly Archives: December 2013

Confessions of a Blogger

I’ve seen this meme floating around, most recently on Liz‘s blog and I figured I’d fill it out as well. I’m not sure how intriguing I’ll be, as I haven’t been blogging or really focused on blogging as much as I have in the past, but I figured it could be fun.

When did you first start blogging and why?

I started blogging around 2000, right as I entered high school. Blogging was a means of an escape for me and it also allowed me to connect with others who had similar stories. As a teenager, I had a hard time connecting with my peers. I spent most of high school hiding under a façade. I was always known for being bubbly and cheerful; someone with a lovely disposition. Truthfully, I was angry and in pain, I just never let anyone see that side of me… at least no one I saw on a daily basis.

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How to Get the Most out of Your Day Spa Experience

A trip to the spa is typically a special event that you get to have every once in a while. Because you probably don’t get to visit a day spa very frequently, getting the most out of your trip is essential. Treatments can be expensive, so you don’t want to be disappointed with the amount of money you spent on a service that wasn’t as good as you expected. In order to really enjoy the luxury that a spa day can provide, you should prepare yourself before hand and follow these tips so that you can relax and have a good time.

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Nix Niches

If you are proud Lifestyle Blogger who refuses to be backed into a corner because of the ever growing revolution of niche blogs, share your love, your life, and your courage by linking up. My hope is to be able to find other Lifestyle Bloggers in an industry where we are becoming the minority and celebrate our blogs every Tuesday.

nixniches


rules

1. Follow my blog on Bloglovin’ or add me to your RSS reader to participate in the blog hops each week.

2. Grab the button and place it on your sidebar or link love page.

3. Stop by the blogs in the blog hop! The blog hop will not be successful if no one visits the other blogs! This is a great opportunity to say hi and support your fellow Lifestyle Bloggers!

4. Share the blog hop with other Lifestyle Bloggers!

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The Newest Member of Our Fleet

Finally after several days, the new layout is up. I’d finished the mock-up 2 or 3 days ago but didn’t have any motivation to actually code it. This morning I was up way to early so I figured I’d be productive and get some items knocked off my to-do list.

I know everyone is or has geared up for the holidays and normally that would be us as well but this year we decided to skip the theatrics. I’m already stressed enough with the infertility diagnosis and I just couldn’t add holiday stress to that list. Thankfully, R and my little sister understood and are completely okay with forgoing it this year. I have to say I’m relieved because I honestly have no idea what to get the two of them, though as a Solstice present to the both of us, we decided to introduce a new member to our fleet.

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Everything

I’ve been fairly absent other than the link up that’s being going on every Tuesday. Some of that is a result of decluttering and the other is just dealing with the journey we’re about to start.

In November, while infertility was a topic and a word that was thrown around, it still for the most part, wasn’t a reality. I left for Texas and was surrounded by my bestie and her kids and I didn’t really have to deal with that topic and all it encompassed. I haven’t quite gotten to the point where I can’t be around kids but I have a feeling the further we get into this journey, the harder it’s going to be to swallow the parents and the children that surround my family and friends. I’m happy for them, I wish them well, but I know that at the end of it all, I’ll look at my empty home and know something’s missing.

Well, now I’m back home and the reality of it all is just now sinking in, and despite my best efforts to act like I’m strong, unfazed, the truth is, there are days when I wonder why I even bother. I obviously fail at life so why am I here? What is my purpose?

I’ve started school which has helped to distract me and I’m actively seeking employment which while I know is the best thing because, 1, it’ll make treatments more affordable, and 2, it’ll give me another distraction, I also know it’s the worse thing because it means having to deal with my “bad days” in front of other people. It means having to smile and laugh when inside I’m dying.

I wish I could say I had it in me to be positive but the truth is, I don’t even have that. It’s going to cost us $1,000 per cycle for the cheapest assisted reproductive technology and the most effective is of course at least $15,000 if not more, depending on all that we need. I can’t even contemplate how we will even begin to afford this so I’ve built up a wall with the expectation that we won’t have kids—at least not if oral + IUI doesn’t work. It’s not what he wants but I have to be realistic. We have to be realistic.

I’ve grown up around disappointment. It’s been the reoccurring theme in my life, so really what’s one more?

It’s everything.